The light inside

Monday, August 27, 2012


I was just thinking as I sat here this morning reflecting on dropping our big 2 off for the start of school this morning, about my definition of good.

What is good?

You see I was thinking about some of the things that are a little chaotic in our lives now, and how I wish they were resolved. Not only do I wish they were resolved, but I wish they were resolved in the manner of my preference.  Ever been there before? I'm sure you have.

Then Romans 8:28 popped into my head. In case you aren't familiar with it, it says this: "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

But if I believe what I profess to believe then I must confess that I believe God is working. And if I believe that God is working, then I must believe he is working "for the good."  So here I am, what is good?

At first I want to say that good things make me happy, they give me warm fuzzies, I'd take all good things all the time.  But, isn't that a pretty juvenile definition of good?

Why do I make my kids go to bed even when they are not sleepy? Because it is good for them. Why do I not eat the entire thing of cookie dough in my fridge in one night? Because it is not good for me. Why do I force my kids to continue with a job, or a task, or an activity that they don't enjoy. Because learning to finish something is good for them. Why do I balance my checkbook when I don't really want to? Because having a grasp on our finances is good for our family.  I'm sure you get the picture.

If I define "good" things as things that are always pleasant and nice then I am really doing a poor job defining the word.

Good things are not always easy, or comfortable, or nice. They don't always make you happy or want to sing.  They are not always the way you would have preferred or even chosen.  But they are always beneficial.  Sometimes only in the big picture and sometimes only in the rear view mirror.

So as I sit and think about the crazy things in my life, I breathe, and take some in some of  His peace. Knowing that it is all working for my "good." That may not be the easy, comfortable, peaceful, relaxing way I would prefer. (I am totally ok, if it does work out that way!) But I rest knowing that it will be for my good, and I will see that some day.

Saturday, August 11, 2012

A big week

This is a big week for our family... 
This is a week of ends, of last times, and goodbyes.  This will be a difficult week.
This is a week of beginnings, of first times, and starting over. This will be a great week.

This week we leave the home we have known for just over a year here in Tennessee, and move to our new life in Texas.
We say goodbye to the people who have become our new friends, and spiritual family. 
We begin the closing of a chapter in our lives that has been difficult, and not at all what we anticipated. A chapter where we have cried, prayed, grown together and lost some of the innocence we once had.  We are wiser, stronger, and have a better knowledge of God and what relying on Him looks like. But I confess I would rather not repeat a year like this one. :)

As I look back and look forward I realize that I need to update on the ways that God (and trust me it has been ALL God) has accomplished for us these last 2 months:

  • Our house- As of this moment this issue is not completely resolved. But in the last week we have had movement (crazy cool God stuff- something coming together the last week we live in town!) and Lord willing we will have some resolution to this issue soon.
  • Contract issues with our job here.  These still exist, and we have not seen how God's provision will come about in this instance. But I live in full confidence that God has already worked this out for us however is best, even if it is not my ideal. :)
  • Our two family members still wait on possible court dates, but we have seen God's working in these matter.  There has already been great movement of His spirit in both our hearts and lives, and theirs.  Although, your prayers would still be greatly appreciated.
  • Justin DOES have a medical license (at least it is being processed) in the state we are moving to!!! This was COMPLETELY God.  To get a license Justin needed to take and pass a JP exam.  These are only given 4 or 5 times a year, and you have to have all of your paperwork in to the examiners 60 days prior to the exam. Despite our best efforts it did not look like this would happen (paperwork was slow in coming from other states, fingerprints were returned as "insufficient" and had to be redone, etc.). However they got all of his paperwork in and allowed him to take the test. So after a long drive he took the test and found out sooner than expected that he passed!!!
  • We found a place to live in Texas. It is bigger and nicer than we expected and we have great landlords!!
  • The reoccurring health issues are still there, but they have been managed once again. And through it all we learned again about God and had the financial resources to take care of all incurred expenses!
It has been an exhausting and difficult ride, but we have known God was with us all the way. If you read this and would like to say a prayer for us we would greatly appreciate it.  We are praying that this next chapter brings us exactly to where God needs us to be, ministering in and to the exact places he wants us. And if I am totally honest, a small bit of respite to catch our breath wouldn't be bad either. ;)